I'm not quite sure how I feel about resolutions. I know we're supposed to assess our lives and decide what to take action on in the coming New Year, and I love the idea of visioning what we want to occur. But as one Wise Woman shared when I asked about the practice on Facebook, "resolutions born of realization and desire can work if you don't use them as a way to beat yourself up. In my experience, they work if you take baby steps. Some of mine have been effective. Some were just 'should's' that I didn't stick to."

I hate "should's" too. Besides, it gets boring having to resolve the same things every year... the same 10 pounds, the same debt paid off, the same promises to call our mothers more often.

What I love is the idea of the New Year. There is so much potential. So much opportunity. It's incredible, really, what can happen in the space of a year. Our children evolve before our eyes, and, hopefully so do we. Babies can be born, businesses can be born. We can take a small step that leads to a giant leap. 

You know her when you see her. She moves purposefully, her feet firmly on the ground. She is gracious, but doesn't make a lot of small talk. Her eyes light up when she speaks and she has a definite opinion. She is confident. She is vital. She is inspired.

Is she you?

It doesn't cost a thing to be inspired. We've seen stories of inspired women around the globe, some with significant financial resources, others with none.

The root meaning of the word inspire? "To breathe life into." Inspired women are full of life.

How do you get inspired? Many will tell you that you can read books or listen to motivational speakers. They will tell you a great story or send you a YouTube video. Maybe a quote?

A couple of weeks ago, I shared with you my expanded vision for WISE: that together we are all WORTHY, INSPIRED, SUPPORTED and ENGAGED.

I want to get into the WORTH piece today, at least a little bit (because it's a BIG issue for us). I believe the need to feel worthy is the most difficult requirement in today's society for women. It is also the desire that is least often addressed or satisfied. It's almost gotten trite, this notion of self-worth. But cynicism around the idea does not change the need for it. And when I talk to women, it is so often the core of that sense that all of us have had... "this isn't enough, I'm not enough, I never have enough."

Let me start by saying: You are perfect. I'd like to say that one more time. You are perfect, just as you are. Are you able to accept that statement, or do you resist it? Does it bring tears to your eyes? That's not uncommon. I've met very few women who had full faith in their own worthiness. Our mistake is to believe that everything we've done "wrong" makes us unworthy. Our mistake is to believe that our mistakes define us. Our mistakes and our wrongs actually make us who we are - and are perfectly suited to what we can achieve with our lives. No mistakes = no lessons. No lessons = No growth. No growth = Stagnation. And we all know what happens to a stagnant pond. For humans, a stagnant life leads to self-loathing, boredom and destructive behaviors. We are not here to be stagnant. We are here to thrive.

by Kiva Leatherman

The first time I saw her, I was totally intimidated. I’d heard of this Andrea person through other friends. Like me, she’d moved to Cincinnati from Boston – and I just had a feeling that something special was in the cards. So I went to a party with an agenda. I saw her across the room… laughing, vivacious (an understatement), irreverent, feisty. I was smitten.

A few days later I called to invite her to coffee. She couldn’t come. What?!?!? I guess she didn’t get the memo from above that we were intended to be BFF’s.

A few days later she called me to invite me to lunch.

Ten years later, lord knows how many martinis, bottles of wine, belly laughs and heart-wrenching tears… she’s my bestest. We are the keepers of secrets, the believers in dreams, each others biggest fans.

Lessons From a Sh*tty Day
 by Allison Nazarian at www.allisonnazarian.com
(Note: I used the * in the title, but for the rest of this blog post, I will be using the word "shitty" - and its variations - in all their glory. If your are offended by this language, I apologize and respectfully suggest that this post is not for you.)

I love Saturdays. There is something about Saturday that just makes me happy and calm and grateful and in my element all at once.

Well, most of the time.

This past Saturday wasn't my usual. It plain-old sucked. In fact, it blindsided me in its crappiness.

Sure, there's nothing new or different about a bad day. We ALL have them. It happens. Pretending it doesn't is silly. But they have a way of happening when we least expect them. 

When I have a bad day, I try to just accept that today will not be the greatest day of my life. I try to allow myself to be in the crappiness of the day. We need the bad days to appreciate and enjoy the great ones - and even the normal ones - all the more.

That's Lesson #1 From A Shitty Day: It is one day. There is always tomorrow.

Truth is, I tend to over-react to people and situations. I react too quickly. Too emotionally. Take things too personally. Can be too defensive. Too black and white. Too quick with my words. And the list goes on...

What initially set me off on the morning of my Shitty Day was a fight between my two kids. It was a bad one (both are black belts in karate, like that bad). In hindsight, I see that is likely that my reaction (bordering on freaking out) escalated the situation instead of diffusing it. 

Lesson #2 From A Shitty Day: You cannot change or control what other people say or do.

By Kiva at www.wiseworkshops.com

I've come to believe, as I'm sure you may too, that there are some books that choose you - that have a way of jumping off the bookshelf and into your lap, causing you to desire nothing else in your time with that book than to devour it.

The first time Eat, Pray, Love found me I didn't quite have this reaction. It was two years ago, maybe three - but I remember reading the first few pages and feeling absolutely nothing. I couldn't relate and there was no draw, no energy between me and those first few pages. I was a relatively new mother and the idea of a woman simply up and leaving her husband, her country, her friends, her comfort - was so beyond... well, me.